A Momma's First Day of School Jitters...As the first day of second grade all too quickly approaches for HappyJay (my 7, almost 8 year old son) I am full of anxiety and am all out dreading the start of this school year. I received, like everyone a school form packet and in the packet lists the classroom teacher's name; she was kind enough to send a second letter introducing herself and that she is eager to get to know each of her students and their families. For typical families this is usually enough. Because, my kids attend a fabulous school in a great school district, this is enough for me for Sparkles (my daughter who is going into 1st grade) and really maybe it should be enough and maybe it would be enough for HappyJay too if I knew who was going to be his Special Education teacher, and who his aides and their schedules with him were.
The school is great, I know I will get all of this information within the first couple days of school. It is hard though, as a mom, to just send your kid to school not knowing what they are doing every second, who they are with, how he is being treated, etc. Then I worry, because it is quite probable ~especially after talking to HappyJay's previous teacher that she will not have him this year, but she will be in the room next to his. Well, that comforts me a little, but I worry that this year too that it will take half of the year for his new Special Ed teacher and him to bond, to know his every quirk, his demands, and how to motivate him. That time is valuable. It is time where he can be pushed, pulled and molded into a better student. I think that is what I am most afraid of. That his time, our time, will not be used effectively and all HappyJay's energy will be put into getting used to yet, another new person where even though I am positive that they will be great and wonderful, just the fact that they are new to him brings disrupt to him and his education.
So there is that, along with all of the other normal anxiety and jitters that go along with sending your kids off to school on the first day of a new school year. On the other side of all the anxiety are all of the hopes..which could feed into the anxieties just a little bit. Like I hope HappyJay makes another friend and that Sparkles makes a best friend and that they can have a group of friends filled with other kids that are just as crazy as they are and that maybe there can be some 'normalcy' in
their our lives. That could be a little too Out There, you know, outside the box, the place we keep all of our BIG dreams, but don't tell people about, the ones that sometimes it hurts too much to dwell on for any real length of time, but they wont go way no matter what, Dreams that SCARE you. So that's where I think I get all those extra anxieties from. Let me know your first day of school anxieties, and your big scary dreams & hopes in the comments below!